From our partner Irene Tarragó
DEDICATED TO ALL CAREGIVERS
Last February 26th, I was walking down the street, calmly thinking about the trip my husband and I were leaving the next day, when my phone rang. It was my husband calling me from the hospital: he’d fallen in the street and had to be taken by ambulance. He seemed to have broken his shoulder. I quickly took a taxi and headed to the hospital. After waiting a while, they called me to help him get dressed. Sure enough, when he fell, the head of his humerus had broken. Apparently, that can’t be repaired. They put a sling on him to immobilize his shoulder, but he was in a lot of pain. They prescribed painkillers and anti-inflammatories. The first few days, he took them almost every two hours. However, we had a pleasant surprise, as one of his brothers had something similar happen to him a few months ago, and he couldn’t sleep the first few nights because of the pain. But from the first night on, he slept well, keeping the pain at bay.
My husband had me very spoiled because, ever since he retired, he’s been the one who takes care of meals at home: thinking about cooking, shopping, … and I, who hate all that things, was so happy. Now it’s my turn. And I find myself absurdly useless in the kitchen. I’ve completely lost the habit and it’s hard for me to think about what we’ll have for lunch and dinner each day. But I’m gradually getting over it.
I, who because of my illness, have sometimes been the one being cared for, now it’s my turn to be the caregiver. It can happen to any of us.
This fact has helped me understand caregivers, because they sacrifice their lives for those they care for. Because I have to be there to help him get out of bed if he has to get up in the night; in the shower; to cut his meat; button his pants… The hours fly by while I’m taking care of him. And I do it with great joy, but it’s tiring because you disappear. I try to maintain some of the leisure routines I had before the accident, like having a non-alcoholic beer before lunch and another before dinner, while watching something on TV or chatting. It helps me pamper myself a little.
But I know this will be a specific time. It’s not the same as those of you who are caregivers all your lives. I send you all the strength in the world to carry it and not let it take you away. Seek help. Some municipalities have programs to help caregivers. It’s so necessary that you make time each day for yourselves…
I, who because of my illness, have sometimes been the one being cared for, now it’s my turn to be the caregiver. It can happen to any of us. And I will carry out this task as best I can, forgetting for a while that I’m sick. It’s not my time now. But I will continue, as much as possible, to follow the three most important rules for a person with epilepsy: take your medication, don’t drink alcohol, and get eight hours of sleep (the latter only if the poor guy lets me). It’s just that I’m not having seizures now. I have to treat this “friend of mine well”, my epilepsy, so she stays calm and restful.
Irene Tarragó Pascau
